Sunday, August 30, 2009

wow i was drunk...

OK. so hmmmmm....

A month ago i planned a party. end of the summer thing.. god know we all needed a drink.

told everybody about it with more that enough time for them to get off work.

Invited around 75 people.

spent a few hundred dollars getting my bar fully stocked with booze i don't even drink but know that other do.


what is wrong with me?

is there a sign above my head that says pathetic loser stay away?

dave and busters would be jealous of my bar.

well waste not want not. i started the evening with my favorite drink. champagne with a splash of pomegranate juice orange juice. i love it. i never get hangovers from champ so thats why its the perfect drink.

three bottles in.......

i ran out of pomegranate juice. but my brothers girlfriend which i totally love, brought some pomegranate liqueur... so i used that instead of juice.

one more bottle in......

i decided to get on facebook and my blog and vent about the atrocity of my party. and later i told everyone in my face book how much i found nerdy guys hot......give it a second.....with EXAMPLES from my former work at the happiest place on earth. also just to mess up my life even more i also gave examples of guys i didnt think were hot. oh the humanity.

this is why all of my party attempts are two months apart. it takes that long to recuperate.

My next major catastrophe is scheduled for the second week of October. A Halloween extravaganza........of maybe 7 people.

i hate my life sometimes.

I hope everyone has a laugh at my expense,

Girlina, Maybe not the Queen of the Universe....Maybe Court Jester.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Recipe for qa good party..................

A buig house with enoughb room for anout a jundred people/

a full bar filled with boooxe that would mnake a profecsionalcbar jeolous.

the lateszdst is musci thatc is awsome.

why is novbody here. ??????????????????????????????????????????????

Isx shte3re a secrety/ .????????????

what dov iv have to do???

doi i have to pay people. ??????

wtf. everytime ti tyhrow a pearty noone shows up[. im three bottle of champagner in to case i baufght. i have a case of beer i got for dreaking games. am i crazy?

Recipe for qa good party..................

Sunday, August 16, 2009


Over the last couple of nights ive noticed that my bed is arranged in such a way to shows how pathetic i realy am.

its a California king (larger than a king) i have pillows and blankets along one side to create this body like shape. When i sleep i snuggle with the pillows. I know this sounds weird but i think this may just help me to realize im alone and want to be with someone.

to test my theory i remade the bed with minimal on it. just a sheet and top sheet and one pillow. went to bed at my normal time. I tossed and turned all night. i could never find a comfortable spot.

the next night i put all my pillows and blankets back onto the bed and i slept a full night without waking.

If there was another person in my bed that i loved would i sleep so well?

Or am i just sad?

i dont know if anyone is reading this but somehow just typing out my inner thoughts helps.

God knows this is cheaper than paying for real therapy

Thursday, August 13, 2009

The Fifth wheel: a observation of life

the number five sucks...... just to start things off.

2 is a happy pair..... 4 a group of friends......but five is an awkward number.

I'm beginning to see with more and more frequency that im always the fifth wheel. there's my two best friends who married each other. Now there's my brother who has met the most wonderful girl. then there's me.

just me

without a match


hehe. thats funny.
Im a virgin. i know i know what a weirdo. ive had sex before but it wasnt really by choice ( thats another blog all together) And you know what. I dont care. Do you have too? No! im not straight so its not as if i need to reproduce.

well that was off topic.....back to it then

As i get older i care less and less about finding a mate ( so to speak) i have the most wonderful friends: Matt and Amanda Chavez ( its funny cause neither of them are Latin in any way) Miss Candi: the world best nurse in training who can literally spend a day in high heals (im so jelous), My brother Justin; who ive grown to see that hes been my best friend all my life. the tree branches out further from there but these are my core. my life would be empty without them.

No matter what there are times that it realy sucks to be the one alone. When we go to an amusement park and all the couples get caricatures and then its my turn i always get the same look. Or you go to a restaurant and theres five of us and they cant put you at a four person table so they have to put you at a six person table and theres always that one seat left over. Or your at a crowded movie theather and i have my bag in the seat next to me so i can be comfortable and theres always that person that asks if im saving it for someone and i have to say no.

I constantly see the couples all around me pairing off as if Noah is on his way with the ark.

am i the one left behind? am i the unicorn?

As much as it bothers me i never let anyone else know about it. I always play it off. To them im the token gay guy in the group that is always checking out the fellas, giving out my brand of advice and doing it with gay flair and a quick wit. when really............ i have no idea what im doing. I look out at the world and am completely lost. Think of me as the salmon fighting upriver to get to something, but for me im fighting up river but have no idea what im doing when i get there.

After all of that I may go home to my room alone but i spent the day with my friends so maybe im not realy alone. Maybe im more lucky than i thought. Or not... I have no fucking idea.

God im a whiny bitch.. lol

content in seclusion,
Girlina Queen of the Universe
or just a Big Silly Homo

p.s. Im not a writer. i never was. i never claimed to be. i tend to go in all directions with my blog. im sorry if sometimes its hard to follow me.